It's amazing how little it takes to bring it back. But something has changed in the way that I see my childhood -- finally. I'm still hurt, still angry, still betrayed, but the tears stop faster. There's a numb layer of scar tissue over the tender places that used to be raw, seeping wounds. My past made me, but it doesn't define me anymore. I've doubled my age since I got away, and I've now been shaped as much by events of my own choosing as I was by the ones inflicted upon me that I just had to survive. It was a close thing more times than I care to admit. Those who know me now would probably find it shocking that I started out as an extrovert. By age 6 I was well on my way toward introversion. I was first suicidal at the age of 10. Spite was my savior then, making me determined enough to keep living, keep going, even if only as revenge. Hate became my shield, and rage was my cold, precise weapon.
So why remember it now? A few days ago I got a message on FB from someone from my childhood; I grew up with her to age 16. We were 11 months apart in age, but by a fluke of birthday dates were in the same grade. We went to the same Baptist church and the same Baptist school, and our families were very involved, which meant we went to mostly all the same evening and weekend things, too: choir, AWANA, gymnastics, youth group, church camping trips, etc. We both got straight A's. She made the cheerleading squad, while I didn't, but I was in band. There was a long time where I thought she was my friend. Maybe there was a brief period I was. Gods know I tried. Not only with her and that family, but with so many others for so very many years. I was sometimes appreciated for my usefulness or willingness, mostly by adults. Peers, though, mostly tolerated me. I was invited to birthday parties if everyone else was. I was thanked for the Christmas presents I gave. Others would say I was involved. The problem was that I wasn’t included, no matter how much I tried to be what I was supposed to be. I was useful, but that just meant I got used; fuck me, but I was grateful for even that. It would have been a kindness if someone had just told me I wasn’t wanted, let alone welcome, instead of waiting for me to give up, go away, broken and defeated. I was too tenacious for my own good, but we all have limits, and I eventually reached mine.
She was one of the golden girls, though, of the family of four of them. They got the popular teachers at school, they got the solos and starring roles, they got the boys. In short, they were popular and pretty and loved. Did they do it on purpose? Mostly not, though some more than others. Were they mean? Not overtly, not to me, and so far as I know, not behind my back, either. I know now that it’s hard to see your own privilege. It’s something I’ve made it a point to learn more about and recognize, in my present and in my past.
So what was in this FB message that inspired so much reflection on my part? That’s the funny thing. It was a mostly copy and pasted message inviting me to learn more about the products available through her new independent consultant business! She said she found my FB posts hilarious, but she’s never liked or commented on a post of mine, and if I asked her to name anything I’d posted in the last year without looking at my wall, I doubt she could. Based on her beliefs, she’d probably be actively offended by a lot of things I post. The throw-away phishing message constitutes the first time she’s “said” anything to me in 19 years. Once again, I’m good enough to be useful. Good enough to be used. A shame that I grew some self-respect and shed that skin a long time ago.
When she first publicly posted about the great opportunity and wonderful products, I actually looked into them. I like to support people that I know in growing their own businesses. I’m a regular and good customer of several people I know who have started their own companies. But what I read about Rodan + Fields puts them in the same MLM bucket as Mark Kay, Alticor/Amway/Quixtar/etc., Herbalife, MonaVie, The Pampered Chef, Pre-Paid Legal Services/LegalShield, and so many other companies that seem to prey on people prone to religious levels of faith, devotion, and ecstasy. The products share the same ingredients as many others available for much less money, and while effective for some are not for others. Nothing groundbreaking, nothing exceptional. I started blocking her posts about the company. I had read that, like most MLMs, the company encourages people to spam their social media and reach out to friends to get them buying or consulting. Many people stopped selling for that very reason -- they didn’t want to pester their friends or use people in that way.
I rate a copy and paste spam message after 19 years of silence. I wonder if there was even a moment’s thought to how that would be received, to what I would think…. a pause as she maybe realized that I deserve more respect than a cold call, that I was a person that she once shared a lot of time and experiences with, that maybe reaching out for its own sake would be appreciated, while being contacted like this would be the lowest of insults. I’m not good enough to talk to, but I’m good enough to make money from, to be used, to be exploited. I’m not real enough to be considered as a whole person with feelings, thoughts, and reactions of my own. She has no idea that I visited her sister’s grave the very next time I was back in southern California after she died. I respect my past, the people in it, the experiences I had. They aren’t all to be treasured. Some deserve the very worst kinds of hell… but they are to be respected. I am worthy of respect, too.
So why remember it now? A few days ago I got a message on FB from someone from my childhood; I grew up with her to age 16. We were 11 months apart in age, but by a fluke of birthday dates were in the same grade. We went to the same Baptist church and the same Baptist school, and our families were very involved, which meant we went to mostly all the same evening and weekend things, too: choir, AWANA, gymnastics, youth group, church camping trips, etc. We both got straight A's. She made the cheerleading squad, while I didn't, but I was in band. There was a long time where I thought she was my friend. Maybe there was a brief period I was. Gods know I tried. Not only with her and that family, but with so many others for so very many years. I was sometimes appreciated for my usefulness or willingness, mostly by adults. Peers, though, mostly tolerated me. I was invited to birthday parties if everyone else was. I was thanked for the Christmas presents I gave. Others would say I was involved. The problem was that I wasn’t included, no matter how much I tried to be what I was supposed to be. I was useful, but that just meant I got used; fuck me, but I was grateful for even that. It would have been a kindness if someone had just told me I wasn’t wanted, let alone welcome, instead of waiting for me to give up, go away, broken and defeated. I was too tenacious for my own good, but we all have limits, and I eventually reached mine.
She was one of the golden girls, though, of the family of four of them. They got the popular teachers at school, they got the solos and starring roles, they got the boys. In short, they were popular and pretty and loved. Did they do it on purpose? Mostly not, though some more than others. Were they mean? Not overtly, not to me, and so far as I know, not behind my back, either. I know now that it’s hard to see your own privilege. It’s something I’ve made it a point to learn more about and recognize, in my present and in my past.
So what was in this FB message that inspired so much reflection on my part? That’s the funny thing. It was a mostly copy and pasted message inviting me to learn more about the products available through her new independent consultant business! She said she found my FB posts hilarious, but she’s never liked or commented on a post of mine, and if I asked her to name anything I’d posted in the last year without looking at my wall, I doubt she could. Based on her beliefs, she’d probably be actively offended by a lot of things I post. The throw-away phishing message constitutes the first time she’s “said” anything to me in 19 years. Once again, I’m good enough to be useful. Good enough to be used. A shame that I grew some self-respect and shed that skin a long time ago.
When she first publicly posted about the great opportunity and wonderful products, I actually looked into them. I like to support people that I know in growing their own businesses. I’m a regular and good customer of several people I know who have started their own companies. But what I read about Rodan + Fields puts them in the same MLM bucket as Mark Kay, Alticor/Amway/Quixtar/etc., Herbalife, MonaVie, The Pampered Chef, Pre-Paid Legal Services/LegalShield, and so many other companies that seem to prey on people prone to religious levels of faith, devotion, and ecstasy. The products share the same ingredients as many others available for much less money, and while effective for some are not for others. Nothing groundbreaking, nothing exceptional. I started blocking her posts about the company. I had read that, like most MLMs, the company encourages people to spam their social media and reach out to friends to get them buying or consulting. Many people stopped selling for that very reason -- they didn’t want to pester their friends or use people in that way.
I rate a copy and paste spam message after 19 years of silence. I wonder if there was even a moment’s thought to how that would be received, to what I would think…. a pause as she maybe realized that I deserve more respect than a cold call, that I was a person that she once shared a lot of time and experiences with, that maybe reaching out for its own sake would be appreciated, while being contacted like this would be the lowest of insults. I’m not good enough to talk to, but I’m good enough to make money from, to be used, to be exploited. I’m not real enough to be considered as a whole person with feelings, thoughts, and reactions of my own. She has no idea that I visited her sister’s grave the very next time I was back in southern California after she died. I respect my past, the people in it, the experiences I had. They aren’t all to be treasured. Some deserve the very worst kinds of hell… but they are to be respected. I am worthy of respect, too.
Originally posted by 
digitalsidhe at Mississippi Personhood Amendment Close to Passage
digitalsidhe at Mississippi Personhood Amendment Close to PassageOriginally posted by gabrielleabelle at Mississippi Personhood Amendment:
gabrielleabelle at Mississippi Personhood Amendment:Okay, so I don't usually do this, but this is an issue getting very little no attention in the mainstream media.
Mississippi is voting on November 8th on whether to pass Amendment 26, the "Personhood Amendment". This amendment would grant fertilized eggs and fetuses personhood status.
Putting aside the contentious issue of abortion, this would effectively outlaw birth control and criminalize women who have miscarriages. This is not a good thing.
Jackson Women's Health Organization is the only place women can get abortions in the entire state, and they are trying to launch a grassroots movement against this amendment. This doesn't just apply to Mississippi, though, as Personhood USA, the group that introduced this amendment, is trying to introduce identical amendments in all 50 states.
What's more, in Mississippi, this amendment is expected to pass. It even has Mississippi Democrats, including the Attorney General, Jim Hood, backing it.
The reason I'm posting this here is because I made a meager donation to the Jackson Women's Health Organization this morning, and I received a personal email back hours later - on a Sunday - thanking me and noting that I'm one of the first "outside" people to contribute.
So if you sometimes pass on political action because you figure that enough other people will do something to make a difference, make an exception on this one. My RSS reader is near silent on this amendment. I only found out about it through a feminist blog. The mainstream media is not reporting on it.
If there is ever a time to donate or send a letter in protest, this would be it.
What to do?
Mississippi is voting on November 8th on whether to pass Amendment 26, the "Personhood Amendment". This amendment would grant fertilized eggs and fetuses personhood status.
Putting aside the contentious issue of abortion, this would effectively outlaw birth control and criminalize women who have miscarriages. This is not a good thing.
Jackson Women's Health Organization is the only place women can get abortions in the entire state, and they are trying to launch a grassroots movement against this amendment. This doesn't just apply to Mississippi, though, as Personhood USA, the group that introduced this amendment, is trying to introduce identical amendments in all 50 states.
What's more, in Mississippi, this amendment is expected to pass. It even has Mississippi Democrats, including the Attorney General, Jim Hood, backing it.
The reason I'm posting this here is because I made a meager donation to the Jackson Women's Health Organization this morning, and I received a personal email back hours later - on a Sunday - thanking me and noting that I'm one of the first "outside" people to contribute.
So if you sometimes pass on political action because you figure that enough other people will do something to make a difference, make an exception on this one. My RSS reader is near silent on this amendment. I only found out about it through a feminist blog. The mainstream media is not reporting on it.
If there is ever a time to donate or send a letter in protest, this would be it.
What to do?
- Read up on it. Wake Up, Mississippi is the home of the grassroots effort to fight this amendment. Daily Kos also has a thorough story on it.
- If you can afford it, you can donate at the site's link.
- You can contact the Democratic National Committee to see why more of our representatives aren't speaking out against this.
- Like this Facebook page to help spread awareness.
You know this entry was originally posted at http://digitalsidhe.dreamwidth.org/84157
- Current Mood:
annoyed
You were born during a Waning Gibbous moon
This phase occurs right after a full moon.
- what it says about you -
You love to let people in on the story of how things come together. You know the background of ideas and have a deep understanding of things others just touch the surface of. You can surprise people with your wide variety of knowledge, and they'll remember and appreciate you for it.
What phase was the moon at on your birthday? Find out at Spacefem.com
- Current Location:EPA
- Current Mood:
sick - Current Music:Fuse
I was browsing my lovely college friend's Etsy shop tonight. She made something I needed to own, and she was wonderful enough to put it where I could buy it. While looking around, I noted that I was for sale! It made me smile. http://www.etsy.com/listing/39170949/ol
I posed for her back in college, my senior year. It's still one of my fondest memories. And I have a set of all the pictures, many of which I adore, and one of which I have on the wall of the family room in my house.
So... you can buy me. or other wonderful creations by my dear friend.
I posed for her back in college, my senior year. It's still one of my fondest memories. And I have a set of all the pictures, many of which I adore, and one of which I have on the wall of the family room in my house.
So... you can buy me. or other wonderful creations by my dear friend.
- Current Mood:
giddy
Leave a comment saying ":>" and I'll respond by asking you five questions to satisfy my curiosity.
Update your journal with the answers to your questions.
Include this explanation and offer to ask other people questions.
dicedork asked me the following:
1. Were you in DST after I left. I never did find out what happened. You can answer in a plot synopsis or OOC drama format--or both if you like.
Yup, I was there to the very last game. Gods, that was a long time ago, and I don't remember at what point you left. I came in as a regular character so late as it was. Let's see... My character Tamatha seized the Ventrue head spot and plotted to oust the Tremere Prince, Nick's character, before he managed to get the whole Court killed. We were under that doom from the higher ups that shit needed to be straightened up or all would die, and he wasn't making any progress on that front. My coup worked just in time for things to go to hell in a handbasket.
Not a whole lot of Court was left at the end, really. Just coming up with enough to staff a Court was hard enough. I'm not sure I ever did.
The Black Spiral Dancer lair was found, filled with cement, and turned into a basketball court.
The Sabbat raided at the last game, lured to some warehouse by us. There was a big, bloody battle, complete with their war ghouls, but we prevailed. Strangely, my character was one of the last left standing and did a lot of the damage to the other side. My generation was so bad that I couldn't even wake up the parts of the court that passed out from blood loss. Thankfully some NPCs from various clans arrived to help clean up the mess and took care of their own. That was pretty much the end of the game.
The unreleased after-story was remarkably unsatisfying (and more than a little bitchy), so I like to pretend that didn't exist.
2.Combo question for the uninitiated. When did you meet the hubby? When/how did you get involved? When/how did you get engaged?
I met Kris at a group outing of mostly DST-folk to see Dracula 2000 at the Brendan by Todos Santos Plaza. It was a miserable movie, and Kris and I were the only unattached people there, so we became an insta-date. His shoulder was cuddly, and did I mention the movie was horrible?
He appeared on occasion as an NPC at some of the Mage games that Celeste ran after DST. When those ended, people scattered. At some point he and Celeste started going out, she moved into his apartment in San Ramon. I ran into him there when I started working in the Leasing Office at the property in 2001. I didn't realize they lived there. Kris and I hung out on occasion after work. Our respective relationships died around the end of 2001. We got together January 2002.
We'd been unofficially engaged since ~2003; the official engagement was in 2004 or 2005. I can only date it that close because I remember where I was living at the time. I'm REALLY bad at dates. Don't ask how many times I've forgotten Kris's bday and our anniversaries. Really, it's painful. In any case, Kris showed up on my doorstep in a dress whites uniform shirt and proposed on his knee and everything. I was surprised by the whole formal proposal (and the gorgeous ring!). I think this year Kris told me that he'd asked my father for permission before the proposal, too. My father said no. I'm vaguely amused, and slightly curious as to why. If it was for any other reason than it wasn't his place to give permission, I'd need to be peeved.
Our wedding was October 8, 2006. Despite popular belief, the wedding was not on Sunday because I had my regular D&D game on Saturday. Yes, we gamed on Saturday anyway... why not? We had to end early for the rehearsal dinner, though. The DM was one of my bridesmen. Yah, our wedding party was all male.
3. I'm guessing your job exposes you to the occasional really messed up story. What is the most messed up thing you've seen that you're willing to share?
That is true. There are so many different kinds of messed up, but I think I'll go with an accumulation of the crazy rather than the disturbing. Every property has a crazy person; it's a law of property management. Sometimes you'll get more than one, but you'll always have at least one.
A winner from the Sacramento area called the office on an almost daily basis to tell us about what her neighbors were doing to her. She could keep us on the phone for hours ranting about how everyone was out to get her. She believed that all of her neighbors were watching for her to leave so that they could enter her apartment to try on her clothing. They'd leave her formerly clean clothes dirty and smelly and put back in the wrong places. She also claimed that these people took her clean dishes out of her kitchen cabinets, broke them, and put them back. She thought that the downstairs neighbors were changing her TV channels with some device from downstairs. She put motion-sensitive alarms on all her doors and windows and had an alarm installed on her car that went off if someone passed within about 6 feet of the car. You can imagine what that was like in a parking-lot situation.
Another winner from the Bay Area believed that the neighbors had cut out several sections of drywall on their side of the wall and removed the insulation in order to put a portable x-ray machine against her wall in order to spy on her. She could hear them rolling it from room to room following her around. She also felt that the newer neighbors around her had moved there specifically to spy on and stalk her.
An elderly winner from Alameda County sincerely believed that the maintenance supervisor was poisoning her through the HVAC system by pumping poison through her vents. He'd killed her cat that way, and was now trying to kill her. She taped up all her vents and windows, had a padlock on her fridge, and had tons of extra locks on her door. She believed that all the Middle Easterners were out to get her, and they were paying the maintenance man to kill her. The upstairs neighbors allegedly drilled holes through their floor and her ceiling in order to spy on her, particularly over the toilet.
4. You have eight friends who are YOUR friends but not mutual friends. Will you tell us how/why this came to be? (Even if it's boring like "I have 8 RSS feeds.")
Lemme look. It looks like I've got 6 communities (corsetry, poly, bdsm, gaming, etc.), I've got one RSS feed (webcomic), and at least 2 others are artists/writers/webcomics that I follow since they post on their blog when they update their stuff online. The others that are "real" people are Seanan's agent, a husband of a friend, a wife of a former lover, an old profile of a friend-of-a-friend, same person's current profile, and an interesting person from the boards of a webnovelist I follow.
5.Favorite role playing game? System? Genre? There's a trick to this question though. No answer can be Vampire, even if that would be the answer.
Eeeew Vampire. Well, I have some love for D&D 3.5, but I'm starting to like Pathfinder more and more. I like fantasy genre, often with something not strictly fantasy thrown in; I'll do modern if there's a good dose of magic in the world. I very much dislike techy, sci-fi, superhero, and futuristic genres. I'd love to do a good horror game, but it seems like Cthulhu and Paranoia cover most of that market, and those don't interest me. I prefer d20 systems, though I miss LARPs. That was a great excuse to wear some good costumes.
I've been in a weekly Saturday (previously Friday) game since 2002. We did D&D exclusively from 3.0 through 3.5 up until roughly 2008. At that point we started rotating systems and DMs every few months. It keeps the DMs from getting burned out, and it allows the gamers to get some Saturdays back if they're not interested in a particular game, system, or DM. We've mostly converted to Pathfinder rules in everything, though we use a variety of stuff from older d20 systems depending on the game. We also have 2 (new) Mage games in the mix; I'm liking those more than I expected I would. Some other systems have been brought up lately, but not ones that really interest me as yet.
Update your journal with the answers to your questions.
Include this explanation and offer to ask other people questions.
dicedork asked me the following:
1. Were you in DST after I left. I never did find out what happened. You can answer in a plot synopsis or OOC drama format--or both if you like.
Yup, I was there to the very last game. Gods, that was a long time ago, and I don't remember at what point you left. I came in as a regular character so late as it was. Let's see... My character Tamatha seized the Ventrue head spot and plotted to oust the Tremere Prince, Nick's character, before he managed to get the whole Court killed. We were under that doom from the higher ups that shit needed to be straightened up or all would die, and he wasn't making any progress on that front. My coup worked just in time for things to go to hell in a handbasket.
Not a whole lot of Court was left at the end, really. Just coming up with enough to staff a Court was hard enough. I'm not sure I ever did.
The Black Spiral Dancer lair was found, filled with cement, and turned into a basketball court.
The Sabbat raided at the last game, lured to some warehouse by us. There was a big, bloody battle, complete with their war ghouls, but we prevailed. Strangely, my character was one of the last left standing and did a lot of the damage to the other side. My generation was so bad that I couldn't even wake up the parts of the court that passed out from blood loss. Thankfully some NPCs from various clans arrived to help clean up the mess and took care of their own. That was pretty much the end of the game.
The unreleased after-story was remarkably unsatisfying (and more than a little bitchy), so I like to pretend that didn't exist.
2.Combo question for the uninitiated. When did you meet the hubby? When/how did you get involved? When/how did you get engaged?
I met Kris at a group outing of mostly DST-folk to see Dracula 2000 at the Brendan by Todos Santos Plaza. It was a miserable movie, and Kris and I were the only unattached people there, so we became an insta-date. His shoulder was cuddly, and did I mention the movie was horrible?
He appeared on occasion as an NPC at some of the Mage games that Celeste ran after DST. When those ended, people scattered. At some point he and Celeste started going out, she moved into his apartment in San Ramon. I ran into him there when I started working in the Leasing Office at the property in 2001. I didn't realize they lived there. Kris and I hung out on occasion after work. Our respective relationships died around the end of 2001. We got together January 2002.
We'd been unofficially engaged since ~2003; the official engagement was in 2004 or 2005. I can only date it that close because I remember where I was living at the time. I'm REALLY bad at dates. Don't ask how many times I've forgotten Kris's bday and our anniversaries. Really, it's painful. In any case, Kris showed up on my doorstep in a dress whites uniform shirt and proposed on his knee and everything. I was surprised by the whole formal proposal (and the gorgeous ring!). I think this year Kris told me that he'd asked my father for permission before the proposal, too. My father said no. I'm vaguely amused, and slightly curious as to why. If it was for any other reason than it wasn't his place to give permission, I'd need to be peeved.
Our wedding was October 8, 2006. Despite popular belief, the wedding was not on Sunday because I had my regular D&D game on Saturday. Yes, we gamed on Saturday anyway... why not? We had to end early for the rehearsal dinner, though. The DM was one of my bridesmen. Yah, our wedding party was all male.
3. I'm guessing your job exposes you to the occasional really messed up story. What is the most messed up thing you've seen that you're willing to share?
That is true. There are so many different kinds of messed up, but I think I'll go with an accumulation of the crazy rather than the disturbing. Every property has a crazy person; it's a law of property management. Sometimes you'll get more than one, but you'll always have at least one.
A winner from the Sacramento area called the office on an almost daily basis to tell us about what her neighbors were doing to her. She could keep us on the phone for hours ranting about how everyone was out to get her. She believed that all of her neighbors were watching for her to leave so that they could enter her apartment to try on her clothing. They'd leave her formerly clean clothes dirty and smelly and put back in the wrong places. She also claimed that these people took her clean dishes out of her kitchen cabinets, broke them, and put them back. She thought that the downstairs neighbors were changing her TV channels with some device from downstairs. She put motion-sensitive alarms on all her doors and windows and had an alarm installed on her car that went off if someone passed within about 6 feet of the car. You can imagine what that was like in a parking-lot situation.
Another winner from the Bay Area believed that the neighbors had cut out several sections of drywall on their side of the wall and removed the insulation in order to put a portable x-ray machine against her wall in order to spy on her. She could hear them rolling it from room to room following her around. She also felt that the newer neighbors around her had moved there specifically to spy on and stalk her.
An elderly winner from Alameda County sincerely believed that the maintenance supervisor was poisoning her through the HVAC system by pumping poison through her vents. He'd killed her cat that way, and was now trying to kill her. She taped up all her vents and windows, had a padlock on her fridge, and had tons of extra locks on her door. She believed that all the Middle Easterners were out to get her, and they were paying the maintenance man to kill her. The upstairs neighbors allegedly drilled holes through their floor and her ceiling in order to spy on her, particularly over the toilet.
4. You have eight friends who are YOUR friends but not mutual friends. Will you tell us how/why this came to be? (Even if it's boring like "I have 8 RSS feeds.")
Lemme look. It looks like I've got 6 communities (corsetry, poly, bdsm, gaming, etc.), I've got one RSS feed (webcomic), and at least 2 others are artists/writers/webcomics that I follow since they post on their blog when they update their stuff online. The others that are "real" people are Seanan's agent, a husband of a friend, a wife of a former lover, an old profile of a friend-of-a-friend, same person's current profile, and an interesting person from the boards of a webnovelist I follow.
5.Favorite role playing game? System? Genre? There's a trick to this question though. No answer can be Vampire, even if that would be the answer.
Eeeew Vampire. Well, I have some love for D&D 3.5, but I'm starting to like Pathfinder more and more. I like fantasy genre, often with something not strictly fantasy thrown in; I'll do modern if there's a good dose of magic in the world. I very much dislike techy, sci-fi, superhero, and futuristic genres. I'd love to do a good horror game, but it seems like Cthulhu and Paranoia cover most of that market, and those don't interest me. I prefer d20 systems, though I miss LARPs. That was a great excuse to wear some good costumes.
I've been in a weekly Saturday (previously Friday) game since 2002. We did D&D exclusively from 3.0 through 3.5 up until roughly 2008. At that point we started rotating systems and DMs every few months. It keeps the DMs from getting burned out, and it allows the gamers to get some Saturdays back if they're not interested in a particular game, system, or DM. We've mostly converted to Pathfinder rules in everything, though we use a variety of stuff from older d20 systems depending on the game. We also have 2 (new) Mage games in the mix; I'm liking those more than I expected I would. Some other systems have been brought up lately, but not ones that really interest me as yet.
- Current Location:San Jose
- Current Mood:unmedicated
New Year's Eve Party
Where: Antioch house
When: Thursday, anytime after 5ish
Who: You and people you know that Kris, Dave, Rey, or I know/like
There will be game systems, something snacky (more is welcome), friends, and fun!
Where: Antioch house
When: Thursday, anytime after 5ish
Who: You and people you know that Kris, Dave, Rey, or I know/like
There will be game systems, something snacky (more is welcome), friends, and fun!
- Current Mood:
chipper
For those of you that don't check/have Facebook...
I want to do something with people on New Year's Eve, and I don't have any plans as yet. So, if anyone else is interested in doing stuff, chime in! I'm willing to host at the house in Antioch. I'm taking the day off, so I've got time. If people have other ideas, feel free to chip in as well.
I want to do something with people on New Year's Eve, and I don't have any plans as yet. So, if anyone else is interested in doing stuff, chime in! I'm willing to host at the house in Antioch. I'm taking the day off, so I've got time. If people have other ideas, feel free to chip in as well.
We already got you the Marilyn Merlot, but that vineyard apparently has a theme: http://marilynwines.com/index.html
The new vintage has a peel 'n' peek label. Heh.
The new vintage has a peel 'n' peek label. Heh.
- Current Mood: amused
A little background: in March, the VP and a Regional at the company I worked for asked me to directly take over a property that had been under my supervision since the previous year. The manager was being terminated (the infamous racist story), and the property needed a very strong hand to get it back in line. They asked me what I would need to do this. What I needed were flexible hours - a 4x10 shift, mileage reimbursement - the property was 45 mile further than my current one each way, computer access from home (again, the office was far), and a definite end date - I did not want to be stuck at the property long term. The terms were agreed to as reasonable. I would be out of the property by the end of 2009, February 2010 at the latest.
In July, I was brought a memo from the President of the company and HR by my new Regional (the messenger). It said that they were eliminating the District Manager position where I was. As such, I would be made the Community Manager of the property I was at. In two weeks my salary would be cut by 20%, I would be hourly, my hours would change to a regular schedule, and I would no longer get a stipend for gas. I was shocked. This violated all the terms agreed to and reduced my pay to levels that were less than in the property's budget and less than I'd made in about 2 years. It would have been impossible for me to pay my bills while losing 20% of my salary and having to come up with gas money to cover the travel for even more days than I was already commuting. It meant I would be losing about $1400 / mo. There was no way I could pay bills on that, and there was still no word on when Kris would be getting work or pay again. I told the President that there was no way I could continue to work for them under these terms and it was breaking everything that was agreed when I took the position -- as a favor to the company. I never wanted that property in the first place, though I'd made a lot of headway in the short time I'd been there. I got back a response of, sorry to hear that, but these are the terms.
So, I updated my resume, posted it, and sent out a lot of applications. The first couple phone interviews in the first week were looking for lower-level mangers than me. The next call I got set up an interview for that afternoon. I got a job offer the next day for a Sr. Community Manager position at a very similar company, but the non-profit version, making what I was before ($800 per year less -- big whoop). I started processing with them, needless to say. They ok'd me the following week, and I gave about 1 1/2 weeks notice, with jury duty the beginning of my last week and a day off in the middle of it, too. Heh. In the end, I worked a whole week at the lower pay rate. The new Regional was supportive and gave me a lot of contacts. He'd actually worked at the company I was going to some years back and had a lot of good things to say about it. He also let me know that because of my work at the property I was leaving, they'd decided to do a lot of interior renovations at the property. Ah, well. I left things far better than I found them and seriously recommended that they put the Assistant Manager in charge when I left. Last I heard they were seriously considering that as well.
So, the new company is based in the Bay Area rather tham Sacramento. That's a plus. The minus is that the property I'm assigned to is in San Jose. They went a bit out of their way to arrange for me to have a studio apartment on site for a really great rate (less than $300 / mo. pre-tax). That means I'm living in San Jose Sunday night through Friday afternoon. The apartment is actually very nice and roomy, but it is lonely all the way down here. With any luck this won't need to be for too long, but it seems that the region most in need of fixing is the San Jose area. And I fix things well. My curse and my gift.
But it's a company that is still growing, where the last one is tightening belts, waiting out this economic storm. I'm in my third week now. I'm feeling more confident where I am. I have things to do. I have training next week so I can finally use our software. The office seems to be running pretty well. Even the maintenance is doing well. Most of what needs catching up here is capital improvements. The bank wants us to spend more money. We made too much this year. What a horrible problem to have, huh? So I'm getting a lot of bids and trying to figure out the new red tape.
That's the state of Amanda at the beginning of September.
- Current Location:San Jose
- Current Mood:
indescribable - Current Music:gLee
FYI for anyone trying to reach me tomorrow - I left my phone at work on accident. I won't be able to pick it up until Saturday.<input ... ></input><input ... >
- Current Location:home
Profile
- amanda_nye
- amanda_nye
- My Shadow Haven
Syndicate
